Tuesday, May 27, 2014

300: Rise of an Empire

Gee, I had to drive all the way to Rainbow Cinema at Yonge & Elgin Mills just to watch this movie without 3D! (It cost me 5 bucks admission, so it's cheap.)

I hate the current trend of putting out films only in 3D at all the major theatre chains. They're trying to gouge me for my precious dollars.

Besides, I don't like wearing those goofy glasses.

300: Rise of an Empire isn't as good as the original 300. The film is a bit too chatty, which throws off the pacing.

Visually, it's quite impressive. The actions scenes are very bloody, though I've seen as good on HBO's Spartacus.

Eva Green (pronounced "Grain") is the shining presence in the film. Her performance is magnificent as Artemisia, commander of the Persian navy. (You may have remembered her inCasino Royale and Kingdom of Heaven.)

I can say I had the great honour to see Eva Green's pubes and beaver lips, but not in these films. You will, however, see her hooters in 300 when Sullivan Stapleton, who plays the Greek commander Themistokles, bangs the hell out of her.

How did a Greek woman like Artemisia come to command Xerxes' navy? In flashbacks, we see the young Artemisia witnessing the slaughter of her family at the hands of Greek soldiers. She is subsequently raped and used as a sex slave for years thereafter. She hates the Greeks so much, she gives her allegiance to the Persians who took her in.

Under Darius, she grew up to become an extraordinary warrior. She gained his trust and was subsequently given control of his navy.

Sullivan Stapleton, whom I've only ever seen in Strike Back, the British series about anti-terrorism in South Africa, plays the leader of the Greek army fighting Xerxes. Since the film is a prequel to 300, King Leonidas is still alive, but we never see Gerard Butler. Lena Headey, who plays Queen Gorgo, takes centre stage here, and I found this rather distracting. She was a constant reminder that I wasn't seeing Leonidas.

Overall, I found the movie entertaining. If you liked 300, you'll probably like 300: Rise of an Empire. But unfortunately I can only give the film...

7/10.

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